Badasses Who Have Lost Their Bad

Stong. Intense. Intimidating. Hollywood badasses can easily create a nice career of doing action flicks. Unfortunately, some venture away from these to show their "softer" side. And unless you are a 16 year old girl, no one wants to see that.

Ah where to start?

3) Dwayne (The Rock) Johnson: After winning a national championship with FSU's football team, winning 16 championships wrestling as The Rock, and staring in a respectable amount of movies, The Rock had earned his badass title with ease. Unfortunately, this was all forgotten when he starred in last years film, "The Tooth Fairy."

Please allow me to copy an excerpt from Wikipedia describing the plot, "One night, Derek steals a dollar from his girlfriend Carly's (Ashley Judd) six-year-old daughter Tess (Destiny Whitlock) that had been left for her lost tooth. Later that night, he receives a summons under his pillow. He magically grows wings and is transported to the realm of tooth fairies."

I rest my case. The only thing The Rock should be doing "magically" is  this

2) Arnold Schwarzenegger, the Governator. Former Mr. Olympia and star of the Terminator movies. He can break you just by looking in your general direction. So why he would sign up for Kindergarten Cop is beyond me.

I'll let Wiki do the talking again, "Using his pet ferret as a class mascot, his police training as a model for structure of the classes, and positive reinforcement, he becomes a much-admired and cherished figure to the children."

I refuse to believe Arnie would ever consider having a pet ferret.

Especially a guy who can pull this off:

1) Vin Diesel: When one thinks of Vin Diesel, they usually imagine him jumping out of helicopters from xXx or driving way too fast in the Fast and Furious films. It really hurts me to have to mention 2005's family comedy, "The Pacifier." At first glance this could be ok. He must be like a rogue who has to "pacify" some evil group of criminals right? ....

You know the drill, "...and to look after the family's five children: ...The kids prove to be difficult to handle, even with the help of nanny Helga..."

At least the nanny has a badass name.

This is what we should all be seeing a lot more of (minus one of the worst comedians of all time at the end of the video).



The Charlotte Bobcats Name Game

Sure there are plenty of post-draft analysis out there but they all basically say the same thing. Not here. The Charlotte Bobcats had the best draft in 2011. Because even if you didn't draft an immediate allstar, you can't go wrong with someone named Bismack Biyombo.

Bismack Biyombo: I'm honestly jealous of this name. And having a 7'7" wingspan doesn't hurt either. My proposed nickname: "Otto Von" Bismack Biyombo inspired by the man pictured below.

Nice helmet.

And watch out for the Maverick's 27th pick in the 2nd round, his last name rhymin' archnemesis, Targuy Ngombo.

Their 9th pick in this draft was Kemba Walker: Not comparable in overall name awesomeness as Biyombo but you cannot overlook who his name rhymes with.

Unfortunately I can't take credit for the following picture:

Oh, and he won a national championship. Team owner Michael Jordan did a great job on this draft. Now MJ just needs to be convinced to hold him up like that before the first game and maybe put some paint across his forehead...

And I'd like to say sorry to the Bobcat's 39th overall pick Jeremy Tyler. The only unique thing about your name is that you have two first names.

I'll give him another double first named man ending in Tyler:

Whadda ya have? Whadda ya have?

Since my junior year of high school I have worked at my local Chick-Fil-A and I can't complain. Well, actually I can but there is a lot to be happy about too. I don't want to bore anyone too much so I'll keep it to my top 4 perks and top 4 annoyances of being a "team member."

Enjoy. And to all of my fellow fast food, nay, "quick-service restaurant" (one of Chick-Fil-A's many taboo phrases) workers, keep on "going the extra mile." Because we all know that our minimum wage income makes us really care less if your fries are cold or if there are two too many pickles on your sandwich.

The top 4 reasons I still work at Chick-Fil-A:

4) The food - I have yet to meet anyone that cannot find one thing on the menu that they enjoy here. Even vegetarians can get a milkshake. Vegans... enjoy a side salad.

3) The regulars - They always know what they want and often have exact change. A win-win for us employees.

2) Fellow employees - Even if you would never be friends with these people in real life, you automatically have something in common when you're both getting yelled at for a sandwich that has butter on it when it wasn't supposed to. The following hour of making fun of said customer is priceless.

1) Spanish - My #1 perk. Almost everyone I work with is fluent in spanish and has no problem speaking just that to me. Not only do I get to hear this language at all times, I also get to learn useful things like how to call each other little girls or how to say, "I'm drunk." I find these much more useful to my everyday life than what we are taught in spanish classes. When am I ever going to need to know the words for abstract art, trigonometry, or flight attendant?

Now the fun part. My top 4 annoyances:

4) People who yell - Whether in the drive through or at the front counter, I can hear fine. If I say I missed a part of the order it's because I wasn't paying attention.

3) Night Owls - We close at 10 PM. Please don't come at 9:55 and order 4 milkshakes. And don't be suprised if the worker tells you, "I'm sorry our machine just stopped working." Not that I've ever pulled that one....

2) The indecisive - I understand if you don't know what you want right away. Just tell me that. That would spare me having to recite the countless prompting phrases of, "Anything else?" or "Will that be all for you today?" And if I ask if you want any sauces and you say, "No, just ketchup..."

Ketchup is a sauce.

1) The rude - At times they can be fun to just smile at while they get more angry but usually they are just plain annoying. Don't tell me, "One sec." Because I know it will be at least a minute more before you end your phone conversation. Also please avoid, "Hang on..." because I'm not desperately holding on to a cliff overlooking an endless abyss.

Just sayin'.

Please enjoy my co-worker Miguel's favorite tune to sing whenever a pretty customer walks in:

¡Qué voz! ¡Qué bonita!

Jamaican Me Crazy

Truth be told, I feel bad for the last post. Now that you have songs that are bad but annoyingly catchy stuck in your head, I've decided to provide some medication. Enjoy my current top 5 reggae jams from a white boy who wishes he could pull off some dreadlocks.

A little bit of roots reggae, little bit of what I like to call progressive reggae, and a whole lot of awesome.  These songs will help you enjoy your summer.



So sit back and just
Chill out mon' cause there's 'no problem' with the following tracks:

5) The Expendables, Sacrifice

4) Put this on a burned CD for your girl and it's a done deal.
Katchafire, Hey Girl



3. Passafire, Kilo

I had to do a live version for Passafire seeing as they are hands down the best concert I've been to (twice now).

2. These guys are no slouch in concert either:
Soja, I Don't Wanna Wait

1. And my current favorite......
Tribal Seeds, All I Know

Tribal Seeds are touring now and I'm seeing them in July. To say that I am excited is an enormous understatement.

Oh and how could a list of reggae songs be complete without a classic. From a TV show produced by a fellow Langley. From the opening credits...

Honorable Mention from Cops:

Inner Circle's Bad Boy's:

That song in particular really speaks to me and my way of life.

Rastaman Drew signing off hoping your day has been brightened.

The Worst Songs To Have Stuck In Your Head

After a long day on the beach with no sounds but the waves of the Gulf and my own thoughts, I have compiled the worst songs to have stuck in your head. A combination of annoyingly catchy hooks, poor vocals, and repitition allow these songs to stick around for what feels like forever.
Primarily Inspired by:

My Top 5:

5)  Avril's Girlfriend:

Such a classic video though.

4) At this point it's already getting tough to separate the next four but im going to go with:

So deep and inspiring. Especially after hearing it repeatedly on the radio and in my head.

3) Number three is often considered the best band of all time. But who am I to judge?

OK so maybe not the BEST band but surely a close 2nd... Right?

2) Getting good now. How I love it when they play this at every Braves Game:

The band name is Rednex... oh did I mention they're Swedish?

1) I apologize in advance for getting this song stuck in your head. Enjoy:

The song is right, after all.

And Show It Begins

Welcome one and all to the most important blog on the internet. Thus begins a journey unlike any other. So unique even hipsters tend to like it (but you can never really tell with them). Please pay close attention to the ginormous boombox background cause its pretty cool. I have a lot of unique thoughts and you will have the pleasure of receiving them if you so choose.

I will also conclude all of my blog posts with a totally awesome video so even if you don't enjoy my thoughts just scroll down to the bottom. Here we go:

I'm 20 years old and I still don't know the result of the classic nursery rhyme, "eeny meeny miney moe." This is not because of my lack of intelligence, (although I did just google search intelligence to avoid an embarrassing misspelling) but rather because it spices up my life. When a choice between two or more things comes down to if a tiger hollers after you catch it by the toe, you really feel a sense of accomplishment in the result. Or if I secretly don't like the outcome, the rhyme is ajusted to end in, "My mother told me to pick the very best one and you are not IT." While that seems like a lot of effort to make a decision I enjoy it just as much as I did when I learned the rhyme around the age of 6.

So yes, I could just grow up and make a decision without running through a 4 lined rhyme but what's the fun in that?

Oh and please don't ruin the ending for me. It has been a good streak of ignorance.


Until next time,
Enjoy a legend: